So a while back I read an article by Kate Sloan from Girly Juice and it has been on my mind a lot, especially since I recently purchased my first two paddles. Like Ms. Sloan, I also suffer from anxiety and bipolar disorder and sometimes I get lost in the jumble of my own head. It is utterly exhausting. My partner is a big help when it comes to handling my moods and can often lift my spirits in varying ways.
But sometimes though I just need a crazy round of sex, preferably with some kink to it, a good spanking or both. Now my partner has a hard time with spankings because hitting me is so far off their radar, but they do it for me and they do it well, much to my delight.
After these times I am emotionally wrung out and very floaty as I come back down from the high that is subspace. I feel better. And when I read the article and realized that I absolutely wasn’t alone it made me feel better. The studies shown in the article also indicate that there are more than just a few people who react well to spankings or other kinky play such as BDSM scenes with their partner. However, Ms. Sloan notes that kink isn’t a replacement for “therapeutic modalities or a cure for mental health issues.” And she’s correct. I wouldn’t be here today without the intervention of my doctor and therapist, but the spankings and kink that I have in my life certainly help me to deal with my mental illness.
And when I am spanked I want to push my own limits to see just how much my mind and body can take. I want it t purge me of the worries, the fears, the anxieties, all those things that create that tangled web inside my head. Now the trick is that my partner isn’t a mind reader and doesn’t always know when I want or need a spanking so I’m trying to improve my communication skills so that it is easier for me to ask them for a spanking as currently it is nearly impossible. Crossing that hurdle is yet another benefit to our relationship and my kinks in general because the more they know, the better our sex life can be. I can’t wait for my next spanking!