Review: Tantus Curve Super Soft

TantusCurveSSBox

My immediate impression of the Tantus Curve Super Soft when I opened it to take pictures was one of curiosity. How could something so soft and flexible be a good g-spot toy? So I wiggled it around and played with it in my hands trying to discern that for a few moments before getting pictures. Then the real fun could begin. So with my handy bottle of lube…

TantusCurveSSStanding

For the first time, ever, I was initially unimpressed with a Tantus toy! I had such hopes that it would get me off like a champ being that A) it was a g-spot toy and B) Tantus has never done me wrong before. Very quickly, however, I figured out what my trouble was. I simply couldn’t get the curve of the Curve in the right spot. It was incredibly frustrating and left me reaching for a different Tantus toy to play with.

Trying to keep an open mind I left the Curve for a few days and pondered just how I could make this toy work for me. I love the Super Soft silicone formula that Tantus uses (I also have the Goliath Super Soft and love it!) and the six inch length of the toy couple with an approximately 1.4 inch diameter was just about perfect for this particular toy. I wanted, needed to find a way to make this toy work for me. So I tried it again, this time using a piece of sex furniture to try and change the angles. Sadly that was a no go as well. By this point I was well and truly annoyed at myself because I couldn’t seem to find the continuous pressure that I needed as the toy moved in and out. It felt great at the opening to my vagina, however, so that was a definite plus and one that I did enjoy quite a lot.

TantusCurveSSTip
The shadowy looking bits are those delightful ridges.

Oh, but finally, my friends, finally I found the Holy Grail of the use of this toy. Letting my partner use it on me (without a strap on) and they could reach to get the angles that I could not. Plus that in and out bit of a pop with those slight ridges along the shaft. And it was glorious! I can only imagine how well this toy could possibly work with a strap on. Even with the bendy, squishiness of the silicone this toy suddenly became great for exactly what I wanted, as long as someone else was at the helm. I may or may not have disturbed the neighbors. Oops! If you like g-spot stimulation, but are somewhat sensitive to it or like a more gentle approach the Curve Super Soft just might be your new jam.

TantusCurveSSBent
So overall, while I had my doubts and challenges with the Tantus Curve Super Soft it turned out to be a winner after all, although it will be reserved for use only with my partner. Which works for me (us.) I received my Curve Super Soft in exchange for a review, but you can purchase yours at www.tantusinc.com, in either midnight purple or black, for $71.63 or $69.99 depending on the color. You can also check your favorite body safe sex toy retailer.

This toy was provided to me by the good folks at Tantus, Inc. in exchange for a fair, honest, and unbiased review. All opinions are my own.

Advertisements

Wicked Wednesday – 319 – Let Your Partner Say No

I’m guessing that some of you read the title of this post and immediately though, “Well duh, Livvy”, but I’m not just talking about giving or removing the idea of enthusiastic consent here, although that’s obviously important as well, even in relationships where there is also implied consent. There is something more to be said for letting your partner say no within a sexual situation (or any situation really.)

Having agency within one’s life, sexual or otherwise is incredibly important and, I feel, incredibly freeing. You’re not obligated to go along with the crowd and it lets you do what you need or want to do both in and out of bed. This is something that I think many people think about too much because going with the flow has always been encouraged, especially, it seems for girls and women. We’re expected to say yes to all kinds of things, even when we want to say no. But back to saying no in a sexual context without specifically removing consent.

Here’s an example of what I mean. Let’s say that my partner wants to try bringing food into the bedroom to play with, but on their own they decide that I wouldn’t like it and therefore they don’t bring the idea up at all because they have essentially already made the choice for me (i.e. assumed I’d say no.) BUT, if my partner comes to me outside of a sexual context and says hey, maybe we should get some edible chocolate and some whipped cream to play with in bed. Suddenly I have agency again and I can decide if it is something I want to do or not. For the record, it would be a no; I’ve heard that the edible chocolate stuff is really gross and I don’t want to be sticky from whipped cream. By not making a choice for me, my partner has given me a choice to say yes or no to that particular act. Notice that I’m not saying no to sex as a whole or to other things, but just to the idea of food in bed. It can be your yum, but it certainly isn’t mine.

The example above is pretty clear and concrete and defines what I mean relatively precisely. And it can be about anything between you and your partner, whether its related to your sex life or not. It’s simply another good way to share your lives together and to communicate in ways that give you both the power to say yes or no to any given thing at any given time. There’s no pressure or expectation that something has to be done, especially when we focus back on sex, and instead it creates an open dialog that might given you more or different or better ideas of things to suggest to your partner.

So, yes it is a form of consent to let your partner say no to something just like any other type of consent that is out there, but in this case it can give them the freedom or permission that they need to say no in other parts of their lives as well because they may feel empowered knowing that they can say no to you, so they can say no to others. Never assume that you’re idea is too kinky or weird or vanilla or whatever and that your partner won’t like it. Just ask them!

 

Sex Beyond Penile Vaginal Intercourse

Sex is typically supposed to be an inherently pleasurable act for two or more parties. Everyone involved should feel comfortable and able to express their feelings and desires. For many straight couples though sex seems to begin and end at the traditional definition of penis in vagina (PIV) sex. Sure maybe some couples are adventuresome and enjoy anal sex, but in many ways it isn’t too different from PIV and that makes it somewhat familiar, while being just a little different and naughty at the same time. And there may be just as many non-straight couples or groups who are stuck in a sex rut of their own. The question here, is how to escape that rut?

One way to do is to look at sex as something more than just intercourse (whatever your definition of that is) and to engage your brain on a more sexual level. Now I know some of you may already do this and get where I’m coming from, but for those of you wondering what does my brain have to do with sex, let me tell you something you might not know. The brain is the largest erogenous zone that we have. It can process sex in visual, auditory, tactile, or even olfactory or tasty ways. Maybe your lover always wears a certain perfume and it trips your buttons (for me its the smell or taste of my favorite lube, coconut oil), the sound of sheets rustling, a naughty picture sent to your cellphone (The Ultimate Sex Toy?) or any number of other things that might grab your attention. Use that as fuel for the fire so to speak. Utilize your imagination to come up with new, creative things to try and run with it.

At that point you’re starting to move away from the idea that sex is strictly “this thing, this way” and exploring territory that may be unfamiliar to you. Maybe technology becomes a larger feature in your sex life (beyond watching porn that is hopefully ethically sourced and paid for rather than by using tube sites, but that’s a different matter) and you discover wearable, remote controllable or Bluetooth capable sex toys. Maybe you sext more. Whatever you’re doing you’re engaging at a different level than “just the basics.”

Your avenues to sexual pleasure and satisfaction are increasing with each new thing that you learn beyond PIV intercourse. Have you ever tried using a dildo on your partner or watching them while they masturbate for you? Have you ever tried fisting? Or flogging? Or even some new weird position that your partner saw in Cosmopolitan or online or whatever? What can you do to make your sex life exciting and fresh? What can you do that isn’t PIV sex that everyone enjoys?

Or maybe you enjoy your sex life just the way it is. That’s fine too. But if you don’t, if you are unhappy with the status quo don’t ever be afraid to approach your sexual partners and say something. Communication is vital to good sex and again there we go with engaging the brain. Maybe part of your communication involves sharing fantasies together and picturing where they could lead if you let them. Maybe you struggle to physically talk about sex. Write it down! Draw a picture! Do what you need to do to move into a new aspect of your sex life that engages your brain more consistently and increases your pleasure. Just whatever you do and however you do it, be safe, sane, consensual, and communicative.

Review: Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples

SatisfyerCouples2I wasn’t sure about this new couples toy from Satisfyer from the get go. It just didn’t look quite right to me as far as angles go and I had some misgivings about whether or not it would suit my body. But before we get into that, let me tell you more about the toy itself.

The silky while silicone of the toy (which is a hallmark of the newest line up of Satisfyer toys) is plush and lovely to the touch and is a perfect compliment to the ABS plastic rose gold buttons. The toy does have a certain elegance about it and I’m sure this plush feeling and muted color choice attribute to that. It is also relatively quiet, much quieter than some previous Satisfyer toys that use the pressure wave technology. And, as a wonderful touch, it happens to be waterproof and recharable. No messing about with batteries here, just clicking the included cable into place with a magnetic charger and plugging the other end into a USB port either on your computer or wall adapter. It can be used with a water or oil based lubricant.

SatisfyerCouplesButtons

The Pro 4 Couples has eleven different intensities of clitoral pressure wave stimulation ranging from barely there to holy crap it’s a jackhammer on my clit, albeit a buzzy jackhammer that is mildly uncomfortable. It also has an arm that vibrates to the tune of ten patterns of varying intensity and steadiness. The steady vibrations are always what seems to work best for me, but if you like a bit of variety the Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples does offer that with the vibration patterns it produces.

Unfortunately the toy didn’t suit my anatomy at all. Either I had the pressure wave stimulator on my clit and the arm kind of just hanging out or I had the vibrating arm inside of me and the clitoral stimulator was nowhere near my clit. My partner tried bending the flexible arm to help me get it in place to no success. So it was basically a no go for me from the outset, although the steady vibrations were relatively rumbly compared to some other toys I’ve used and the patterns were OK, but again not my thing. So, sadly, my despite our best attempts, my partner and I couldn’t make this toy work for us no matter how hard we tried.

SatisfyerCouplesFlex

But, if couples toys are your thing and you want to try a quality product that is well made I would suggest the Satisfyer Pro 4 Couples. You can purchase it directly from the www.satisfyer.com shop for $69.95 or check your favorite body safe sex toy retailer.

This toy was provided to me by the good folks at Satisfyer in exchange for a fair, honest, and unbiased review. All opinions are my own.

Review: Charm Wand

The Charm is a small handheld wand that is sold through www.pinkbob.com. I was quite excited to add another wand to my slowly growing collection, especially something that is a bit smaller than some of the other wands that I own. Immediately I wondered though, would it be powerful enough to get me off? I plugged it in for a good charge and then decided to find out.

First off, let me say that this wand is made of silicone and ABS plastic and works with water or oil based lubricant which is a big plus to me and it is rechargeable via the included USB cable. It does not, however, appear to say whether or not the toy is waterproof or water resistant, but I would always err on the side of caution and assume any toy not explicitly stated to be waterproof is not. It offers seven functions, six of which are patterns, and one of which is a steady one speed fits all basic setting. Now I hate patterns so this wasn’t ideal for me.

It is, happily, not as loud as it first appears, although it would be noticeable even through a closed door I think. The Charm does what it is supposed to do in that it provides broad stimulation to the vulva and clitoris, but I’m a little bit iffy on the power of the wand itself, especially given that I have a bullet vibrator that provides pinpoint stimulation that has the same amount of power packed in a much smaller toy. The difference, I suppose is that each toy has its own unique purpose, but I would liked to have seen more power in the Charm than it has. That said, it is not like the Charm Wand couldn’t get me off. It could and did, but the orgasms weren’t altogether satisfying. I wanted deep, body shaking orgasms like I’m used to getting from my other wands and instead I got ones that were “just” orgasms. No body quaking, earth moving, moan loud enough to wake the neighbors, just perfectly adequate orgasms.

I still absolutely love the fact that it is so small and can be used with other toys or a partner without getting in the way, but the orgasms themselves are just frustrating to me. I was really hoping for something a little stronger. That said I don’t hate the Charm Wand and I think it may have a day when I do have more than adequate orgasms from it if I’m feeling particularly sensitive, but lately that hasn’t been the case for me. So maybe there’s hope after all.

Of the toys I was sent by PinkBOB and their sister site Too Timid, this was the better toy (you can read the other review here) and could possibly see some use as a back massager as well as a sex toy for me. It could be that this toy really shines at getting the knots out of back; who knows? At any rate if you’re interested in a small wand with a smooth silicone finish, several patterns to choose from, and something less intense than say a Magic Wand, this could be the perfect toy for you. You can purchase it at www.pinkbob.com for $69.95.

#SOSS 10 Round Up Some Love

This edition of #SOSS brought to you by marzipan candy and a salad; never mind that’s lunch. Anyway, I hope that y’all find these post as entertaining or enlightening as I have. Happy reading!

We Are Shadows by the ever lovely Ella Scandal is a work that you need to read for yourself. The story is fantastic and, as always, well written with a fun twist that I never expected at the end.

Bare Essentials by Wicked Wednesday’s host, Marie Rebelle, made me squirm and laugh at the same time. I’m glad I got to read the story in its entirety and love how the events all went down. Nothing like a little fun between partners right?

The Yoga Sutra and D/s by Brigit of Brigit Writes stuck a chord within me as I’ve done just enough of both D/s and yoga to start to have a grasp on her words and how much sense they make to me. It inspires me to get back to my yoga that I’ve been neglecting and to work at being more present in my D/s life.

Your sex blogger voice matters by Isabelle Lauren really made me stop and think about how I feel about writing about topics  others have already covered. I feel like I’m not good enough to cover those topics as well and have something new enough or different enough that my voice will make a difference. Looks like I need to get out of my own head a bit and write what I want to write.

 

Review: Flexible Silicone Vibrating Dildo

When I received this dildo from www.tootimid.com my curiosity was piqued when I opened the package to reveal a somewhat wobbly g-spot toy. The vibrating dildo has a lot of give to it in the middle, which made me wonder if it would work for me because my g-spot is very picky about what it likes and that tends to be lots of pleasure…err pressure. So I charged it up via the included USB cable and away we went.

FlexibleDildoButtonsLit1

The very first thing I noticed as the toy was charging is that the lights on the buttons are an incredibly obnoxious shade of blue, one that would draw the eye if it was left, say charging on dresser and someone walked into the room. There would be no mistaking it for exactly what it is. So if you like a little discretion make sure this one is definitely put away before any company comes over. The upside to the bright lights is that once the toy is turned one the buttons are easy to see in a dark room (which I’m sure was the intent.)

This vibrating dildo has a slightly bulbous head with some slight ridges along it. Inside of me the ridges were absolutely unnoticeable and therefore unremarkable. The shape of the head isn’t bad but it is pretty basic as far as g-spot toys go. However, while I probably could’ve orgasmed from thrusting the head against my g-spot I found that the toy had too much flex and give to it for me to adequately thrust as hard or even as fast as I might like.

FlexibleDildoHead1

Beyond the fact that this toy and I simply aren’t compatible it is a nice looking toy. The silicone is smooth to the touch and while I can see mold lines where the toy was made I can’t feel them even running my hand over them. The ABS plastic handle is suitably shiny and reflective which is a nice touch, but with lube coated fingers can be a bit slippery. Another quality issue I noticed is that the motor in the end of toy sounds like it isn’t seated quite properly and while it doesn’t rattle around like it might break it is noticeable if you give the toy a good shake or flex. It probably isn’t a big deal and it didn’t seem to affect the toy’s performance, but I do like to be thorough.

FlexibleDildoFullLength1

It offers four patterns and three speeds that fall somewhere between rumbly and buzzy and the only one that did for me was the strongest speed, but even then the flex of the toy meant that I couldn’t get it in just the right spot to have an orgasm. Granted I tend to HATE patterns in my vibrators so the fact that they didn’t do much for isn’t surprising. Overall I’m going to have to make the call and say this one was a dud for me.Despite my lackluster experience, if you’d like to give this toy a try and perhaps enjoy it far more than I did you can find it at wwww.tootimid.com for $54.95.

This Flexible Silicone Vibrating Dildo was sent to me by Too Timid in exchange for a fair, honest, and unbiased review. All opinions are my own.