Review: Satisfyer Whale

SatisfyerWhaleBox

Whale? Really? I was pretty underwhelmed at the Satisfyer Whale the instant I saw it in person, but the name is what really got to me. From an aesthetic standpoint I get the name, but from a marketing angle it makes zero sense to me. I definitely wish this toy had a better name. That said, it is cute and does kind of remind me of a humpback whale so maybe the name did its job. But I still don’t see how it relates to a sex toy. Just my thoughts.

SatisfyerWhaleCloseup

Moving on, the Whale is designed to be a waterproof, wearable vibrator that can be used during penetrative sex. Made from ABS and a nice smooth silicone it is both body safe and easy to clean. The Whale takes roughly two hours to get to a full charge, though the manual says the first charge could take up to eight hours, and it has a magnetic charger that is simple to use and not at all fussy just like the rest of the Satisfyer line-up. It has ten vibration speeds and patterns, comes in at three inches on the top arm and 2 and a half inches on the bottom. There are motors in each arm to provide direct clitoral and vaginal (G-spot) stimulation. To me the motors provided a vibration that was somewhere between buzzy at the low end to a bit rumbly on some of the settings, but nothing close to the rumbliness that I typically prefer. Overall though the vibrations weren’t terrible and I can see using this toy as a teaser while watching or reading some porn.

SatisfyerWhalePacking

Upon trying it out, my partner declared it to be painful and uncomfortable and without it being held in place it would slide right out anytime they moved. Not exactly the things one is looking for in a wearable vibrator. It was also difficult trying to get the outer arm situated so that it provided direct stimulation to my clit, but I think this is very anatomy dependent and might work better for someone with smaller labia. I decided to try this toy out with a dildo (the Tantus Echo Handle for the curious) to see how it would work when it wasn’t causing someone else physical pain. Turns out, that unless I held the Whale in place it slipped right out again which didn’t really surprise me, although I did have a surprisingly pleasant orgasm using the Whale with a dildo. So if you don’t mind holding it in place it can be a stellar toy. I’m wondering if perhaps, as a plus size woman, this toy simply isn’t the right shape for my anatomy overall and perhaps that contributed to my having to hold it in place.

My final impressions were far better than my first as I expected little to nothing from this toy in the game of orgasms, but I was quite surprised, even if my use case wasn’t exactly as advertised. It reached the goal of it giving me an orgasm, it functions as designed, and is a well made toy overall. If you’re interested in picking one of these up, Peepshow Toys carries them for $49.95 or you can shop your favorite body safe sex toy retailer.

SatisfyerWhaleCharger

The Satisfyer Whale was provided to me by Peepshow Toys in exchange for a fair, honest, and unbiased review. There are affiliate links used in this post.

P.S. You can now save 10% storewide with coupon code “LIVVY” Go check it out!

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Review: Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation

This toy arrived incredibly quickly, especially given that it was shipped directly to me from the Satisfyer headquarters in Germany. The packing was a plain white box with a bill of lading that gave no information as to the contents or where the package was coming from in regards to the company itself. When I opened the box, the Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation was well packed and secure within the box.

Satisfyer2NGPackage

Upon removal the packing looks identical to the regular Satisfyer Pro 2 box with the exception of being labeled “Next Generation.” I would’ve liked to have seen something a little different just for the sake of variety and ease of telling the products apart at a glance. I broke the Hygienic Seal on the box and opened to reveal a toy that looks identical to the Satisfyer Pro 2. We’ll see if the claims that it is quieter, has better power, and if its differently designed head make a difference in my pleasure.

My first impression of the toy, when turning it on, is that it is definitely much quieter than the original Satisfyer Pro 2. This will be a good thing for anyone who wants some privacy or has shared housing. Put it under a blanket and close the door and it would be unnoticeable. When I got to playing around with it, I noted that it the light was much less bright than its predecessor and that the buttons to change the settings are slightly larger and easier to hit. The body of Pro 2 and the Pro 2 Next Generation are still identical in shape and size (I was hoping for a slightly longer handle), but the head on the Next Generation is significantly wider and overall larger than the one on the Pro 2. According to Satisfyer, out of a focus group of 250 women, 98.7% of them preferred the new larger head. According to my clit I have a hard time telling the difference. Another claim is that the Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Gen has better power than the regular Pro 2. This claim is one that I can agree with and I was able to orgasm with the Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation as easily or more so than I was with the original Satisfyer Pro 2 And, as with the original Pro 2 this toy is also stated to be waterproof.

Left: Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation                               Right: Satisfyer Pro 2

Going back to the buttons on the two different models, the original Pro 2 didn’t let you adjust power levels up and down (it only went all the way up before going back down) whereas the Pro 2 Next Gen allows for going back and forth along the range of pulses. I know this is a fix that many people are likely to appreciate. I certainly did! My only initial complaint about the buttons was that they felt stiff and hard to push. Then I realized I was pushing too far from the center of the buttons and everything was fine again. I felt a little silly even.

Satisfyer2NGScript

If I had to choose between the two toys, I would pick the Pro 2 Next Generation, if for no other reason than that it is quieter and more powerful that the original Satisfyer Pro 2. Those two things alone sold me on the newer version of the toy right away. The less bright light and the size of the head are both incidental things, that to me, are useful and good, but not earth shattering whereas the better powered Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation has a lot going for it! It is available from Peepshow Toys for $69.00 or you can shop at your favorite body safe sex toy retailer.

The Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation was provided to me for free from the Satisfyer brand in exchange for a fair, unbiased, and honest review. There are affiliate links used in this post.